Mom: Yes, Great Orange Land Mass?
Toby: I... wait, what? That was rude. I haven't been a land mass in some time now. Remember? That lady at the Stabby Place who violated my dignity said I was a svelte 18 lbs! Ok, maybe it was *me* who said I was svelte. But still. I'm not 23 lbs anymore.
Mom: Sorry, Great Orange Dude. What did you want?
Mom: No, dear. I'm feeding you the same amount per day. Just smaller meals and more of them. It just seems like less because you've gotten in the habit of scarfing down your gushy foods and gobbling up Leia's as fast as possible.
Toby: Well, it feels like I'm getting cheated! Oh, and that observation is a bit purrsonal, don't you think?
Mom: Not really, no. Because you make it rather public when it immediately comes back up. On the carpet. Very impressive mess. Kibble yak just can't match this. We're starting to run low on enzyme cleaner. And I'm pretty sure nothing is getting that one special stain out!
Toby: Whatev. And another thing - even worse - don't think I haven't noticed you carrying Leia's bowl out at meal times. She even told me you're feeding her in bed. How fair is that?? Why can't I get that kind of treatment?
Mom: I feed Leia wherever she happens to be. Hopefully far away from YOU, since otherwise I have to hold you back from getting into her noms before you even finish your own.
Toby: Hmpf. This is going on your Permanent Record, I tell you. And can someone please tell me where to file a grievance over this injustice? Someone? Anyone??