I am innocent, I tell you! Here I am, having to keep a careful eye on that tabby wench in case she bites me again. Last night I was lounging upstairs, and she's just sitting there staring into space, when she walks around behind me and starts biting my tummy!
All those years of hits and runs, and being smacked around by the Great Orange One, and I'm ready for some payback, y'all. Even now it's not over - he's hogging MY spot! Here you can see I am patiently waiting for someone's ample butt to move out of MY spot. Everyone knows the end of the couch is MY spot. He's just being mean, that's all.
They are BOTH being stone cold brats lately.