Mom: Yes, Great Orange Land Mass?
Toby: I... wait, what? That was rude. I haven't been a land mass in some time now. Remember? That lady at the Stabby Place who violated my dignity said I was a svelte 18 lbs! Ok, maybe it was *me* who said I was svelte. But still. I'm not 23 lbs anymore.
Mom: Sorry, Great Orange Dude. What did you want?
Mom: No, dear. I'm feeding you the same amount per day. Just smaller meals and more of them. It just seems like less because you've gotten in the habit of scarfing down your gushy foods and gobbling up Leia's as fast as possible.
Toby: Well, it feels like I'm getting cheated! Oh, and that observation is a bit purrsonal, don't you think?
Mom: Not really, no. Because you make it rather public when it immediately comes back up. On the carpet. Very impressive mess. Kibble yak just can't match this. We're starting to run low on enzyme cleaner. And I'm pretty sure nothing is getting that one special stain out!
Toby: Whatev. And another thing - even worse - don't think I haven't noticed you carrying Leia's bowl out at meal times. She even told me you're feeding her in bed. How fair is that?? Why can't I get that kind of treatment?
Mom: I feed Leia wherever she happens to be. Hopefully far away from YOU, since otherwise I have to hold you back from getting into her noms before you even finish your own.
Toby: Hmpf. This is going on your Permanent Record, I tell you. And can someone please tell me where to file a grievance over this injustice? Someone? Anyone??
Toby, I think you and Binga have similar complaints - she thinks she is getting cheated on food too!
ReplyDeleteP.S. Concatulations on the weight loss!
Aww, poor fella! Being cheated out of someone elses food.. hee hee Good job on the weight loss and whoo hoo, feedings more often is pretty cool, don't you think? And you get to keep more of it rather than lose it to 'carpet tax'! That should make you feel better!
ReplyDeleteToby, I totally feel your pain, since my mom is trying to starve me, too. It's terrible, I tell you, terrible! I just hope that after this I can do as well as you've done!
ReplyDeleteToby, congrats on your weight loss from us too! Nicki will confirm that food from someone else's dish tastes better...even when food remains in your own.
ReplyDeleteBTW, we get fed small amounts quite often, because one of us (Derry) throws it all up when his tummy gets too empty. He doesn't eat quickly (compared to Nicki), but when he's overly hungry it just doesn't sit well. And our human will tell you that nothing is worse than the stains from canned food, never mind kibble. LOL. She uses a cleaner from a local grocery store's organic section that is only distilled water and hydrogen peroxide. Works well!
Land Mass, eh? We have a couple of those...
ReplyDeleteYou poor boy Toby! Not only starving but insulted too. Concats on your weight loss though.
ReplyDelete